Selasa, 29 November 2011
NBA Is Back, But 76ers Return
This year on December 25th, hoop fans will be able to un-wrap the gift of a salvaged NBA season. No more guessing as to whether or not LeBron will participate in a charity game. No more watching Euroleague Basketball to catch a glimpse of NBA talent. We will finally get to see NBA competition once again. Although this is something we should all be Tebowing over, Sixers fans in particular should look at this year as the beginning of something special.
The key to any successful franchise is its ownership. Take a look at the NBA squads that have been successful, and an ownership with a proven track record will surely follow. Just look at the overzealous Mark Cuban and what he has done with the NBA Champion Dallas Mavericks. That type of passion is something that has been missing from the Sixers’ front office since the departure of Pat Croce. It appears as though new Managing Owner Joshua Harris is going to bring that back to the city. During this stagnant off-season he has already vowed to bring Dr. J back to the team in some capacity, added esteemed Jeff Capel to the coaching staff and gave Hip-Hop, the mascot, a pink slip. Just wait until he can begin to make moves with the roster! This is a guy that knows this team needs to make changes from top to bottom and he’s not afraid to do it.
We can all play fantasy owner and dream up trades that would make the Sixers an instant contender (Elton Brand to any team is my favorite) but the current roster may not perform all that bad in a shortened season. The Sixers won’t be faced with the challenge of adapting to a new head coach like the LA Lakers. Nor will they have to worry about vital rookies adapting to a new system like teams who had lottery picks in this summer’s draft. Barring any unforeseeable blockbuster trades, the Sixers will be heading into this season with the same group of guys that finished last year on a hot streak. Add the fact that a 66 game schedule, with only 18 of those against the Western Conference, the Sixers are sure to luck up and avoid playing some of the top Western Conference teams this year. The last time the Sixers played a shortened season (1999 NBA Lockout) they improved from the 14th spot in the Eastern Conference to a six seed in the playoffs. Fans of the storied franchise can only hope for similar results come this season.
We can also look forward to a breakout season from point guard Jrue Holiday. Last year he averaged 14 points and 6 assists per game in just his second year in the league. His numbers were significantly better after the All-Star break and I see no reason for that success not to continue, especially under the tutelage of head coach and former All-Star point guard Doug Collins. If he can get the job done at the point without the help of a single All-Star on his team, it’s no telling what Holiday can do once he is surrounded by the right talent.
Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not ordering that we clean the rafters and make room for a championship banner anytime soon. Sure there are a lot of questions left unanswered as we prepare for this unique season to unfold. We don’t know if Andre Iguodala will finally earn his $90 million contract. It’s uncertain if Elton Brand will spend more time on the floor than the kids that sweep the court. Hell, we still don’t even have a mascot! One thing is for certain- as the franchise works its way back to the top of the Eastern Conference, this season will serve as an early milestone for how it will all come together.
Minggu, 20 November 2011
Mike Tyson Is...Herman Cain
Selasa, 08 November 2011
Piss on Week 11.10.11
Warning!! No one in the following post is actually being pissed on. It is simply an expression meant to describe how outrageous and unforgivable the actions of the following people really are. Anyone who finds this segment offensive automatically gives me the right and the duty to piss on them as well.
Sincerely,
Professional Rationalist
10. 50 Cent
No this wasn’t a Halloween costume. 50 Cent really went and got braids in 2011.
He gets the business for thinking that just because he has money he won’t get pissed on for getting vintage Iverson braids .
9. Lindsey Iglesias and Lee Brooks
These two knuckleheads recently committed 8 burglaries inside of the Donovan Smith mobile home park. They stole flat screens, video game systems and allegedly found time to take a nap in one of the houses they robbed.
That’s right! This fake ass Bonnie and Clyde get pissed on for sleeping on the job.
8. People Who Can’t Park
One of my neighbors drives a Mini Cooper and she never fails to take up two parking spots. Despite the fact that she could probably fit her miniature vehicle through her front door, she always takes up a space big enough for an SUV.
This chick and anyone else who doesn’t understand the concept of one car equals one parking spot gets “wet up.”
7. JetBlue
A flight from Miami to New Jersey should only take a few hours. So imagine how frustrated JetBlue passengers where when they were stranded on a plane for 7 hours due to technical difficulties.
JetBlue gets pissed on for having those people on the plane all day and only having soda and pretzels for them to eat.
6. Nick Cannon
It’s been a while since Nick Cannon has made my list, but once I heard this song I had to welcome him back.
Nick the Quick gets pissed on for not realizing that the only thing he ever pimped was Nickelodeon.
5. Michael Zuk
Pictured above is the tooth of Beetle John Lennon, which Michael Zuk purchased for $31,000. http://www.cnn.com/2011/11/05/world/europe/uk-lennon-tooth-auction/index.html?hpt=hp_t2
Michael Zuk gets pissed on for playing Tooth Fairy and spending so much cash on a rotten tooth.
4. Unemployment Benefits
I was reading the news the other day and I came across and pitiful statistic..Only 48% of unemployed people are receiving benefits because most people have exhausted their 99 weeks of eligibility.
If people can’t find a job in 99 weeks, I think the system has to be pissed on. Wouldn’t you agree?
3. Pet Hippopotamus
I’ve always wanted a pet white tiger and people look at me like I’m crazy when I say it. Well if I can’t have a white tiger than it’s no way this chick can have a pet hippo.
Out of all the exotic pets someone could grab, choosing a hippo definitely gets this chick pissed on.
2. Texting Bride
Imagine after years of nagging you finally decide to bite the bullet and marry your girl, and this is what she does at the alter.
This chick gets pissed on for feeling that she immediately had to change her status to married on Facebook. The shake before the zip goes to the groom for not calling the whole thing off right then and there.
1. Follow us on Twitter
If you like what you see here, then follow us on Twitter @31Percent for info about upcoming events and giveaways.
Otherwise you join the list of people that have been pissed on!
Sincerely,
Professional Rationalist
10. 50 Cent
No this wasn’t a Halloween costume. 50 Cent really went and got braids in 2011.
He gets the business for thinking that just because he has money he won’t get pissed on for getting vintage Iverson braids .
9. Lindsey Iglesias and Lee Brooks
These two knuckleheads recently committed 8 burglaries inside of the Donovan Smith mobile home park. They stole flat screens, video game systems and allegedly found time to take a nap in one of the houses they robbed.
That’s right! This fake ass Bonnie and Clyde get pissed on for sleeping on the job.
8. People Who Can’t Park
One of my neighbors drives a Mini Cooper and she never fails to take up two parking spots. Despite the fact that she could probably fit her miniature vehicle through her front door, she always takes up a space big enough for an SUV.
This chick and anyone else who doesn’t understand the concept of one car equals one parking spot gets “wet up.”
7. JetBlue
A flight from Miami to New Jersey should only take a few hours. So imagine how frustrated JetBlue passengers where when they were stranded on a plane for 7 hours due to technical difficulties.
JetBlue gets pissed on for having those people on the plane all day and only having soda and pretzels for them to eat.
6. Nick Cannon
It’s been a while since Nick Cannon has made my list, but once I heard this song I had to welcome him back.
Nick the Quick gets pissed on for not realizing that the only thing he ever pimped was Nickelodeon.
5. Michael Zuk
Pictured above is the tooth of Beetle John Lennon, which Michael Zuk purchased for $31,000. http://www.cnn.com/2011/11/05/world/europe/uk-lennon-tooth-auction/index.html?hpt=hp_t2
Michael Zuk gets pissed on for playing Tooth Fairy and spending so much cash on a rotten tooth.
4. Unemployment Benefits
I was reading the news the other day and I came across and pitiful statistic..Only 48% of unemployed people are receiving benefits because most people have exhausted their 99 weeks of eligibility.
If people can’t find a job in 99 weeks, I think the system has to be pissed on. Wouldn’t you agree?
3. Pet Hippopotamus
I’ve always wanted a pet white tiger and people look at me like I’m crazy when I say it. Well if I can’t have a white tiger than it’s no way this chick can have a pet hippo.
Out of all the exotic pets someone could grab, choosing a hippo definitely gets this chick pissed on.
2. Texting Bride
Imagine after years of nagging you finally decide to bite the bullet and marry your girl, and this is what she does at the alter.
This chick gets pissed on for feeling that she immediately had to change her status to married on Facebook. The shake before the zip goes to the groom for not calling the whole thing off right then and there.
1. Follow us on Twitter
If you like what you see here, then follow us on Twitter @31Percent for info about upcoming events and giveaways.
Otherwise you join the list of people that have been pissed on!
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