Piss on Week 10.11.10

Warning!! No one in the following blog post is actually being pissed on. It is simply an expression meant to discribe how outrageous and unforgiveable the actions of the following people really are. Anyone who fines this segment offensive has the right and the duty to be pissed on as well.

Sinceely,

Professional Rationalist




10. Oprah Winfrey

Oprah gave $1 million to Mastery Charter High School this past month.

She gets the business for not spreading the wealth my way. Sorry Oprah, but I’ve got bills too.

9. Baltimore Charm

I don’t care if these lovely women are playing football in lingerie or not.

Anyone who gets beat in a football game 60 to 6 deserves to be pissed on.


8. JoJo Simmons


Your sisters have fashion and your little brother Diggy has become the rapper you were supposed to be.

Sounds to me like all you have left is a spot on this week’s urination.

7. LeBron James


Lebron really thinks that people dislike him becomes he is black.

He is getting the business for not realizing that people don’t like him because he makes $100 million and they don’t.

6. Brandy

I didn’t want to see her on Moesha. I didn’t want to pay her any mind when she had a reality show. Hell, I didn’t even want to see her Sitting on Top of the World.

Nonetheless she gets pissed on for thinking that I want to see her Dancing with the Stars.

P.S.I thought it was Dancing with the Stars.

5. Rick Ross



In response to a sex tape containing a Rick Ross imposter the MC stated, “It’s actually funny and flattering to know fat ni**as getting pu**y all around the world.”

He gets the business for thinking he is a spokesman for obese intercourse.

4. The SugarHouse Casino

The city of Philadelphia is constantly struggling with unemployment, crime and a sub par quality of living compared to neighboring East Coast cities, and a casino is supposed to be the answer to our problems?

I’m pissing on the city planners who thought we needed another drain to throw our money down.

3. Salad Bars


Seriously!

What am I supposed to do with an assortment of croutons and Iceberg lettuce besides piss on it?

2. Sallie Mae


Can you believe these fools had the nerve to call me on a Sunday about student loan payments?

They get the business for not honoring the Sabbath.


1. Mike Vick


At much as it pains me Mike, I’ve gotta piss on you.

Because you didn’t slide on that run play, I was forced to watch Kevin Kolb stink it up against the Skins.