Piss on Week 7.27.11

Warning!! No one in the following post is actually being pissed on. It is simply an expression meant to describe how outrageous and unforgivable the actions of the following people really are. Anyone who finds this segment offensive automatically gives me the right and the duty to piss on them as well.

Sincerely,

Professional Rationalist

10. Khalifa


There is nothing wrong with a guy “going downtown” on his woman. I do however think that it is something that should be done in private and not on stage at a concert.

Whiz Khalifa gets pissed on for thinking that he has to let us know that he is still seeing Amber Rose. We get it...you guys are having sex!!

9. Donna Simpson


This 700 pound woman is really trying to gain 300 pounds so that she can hold the Guiness World Record’s title of World’s Most Obese Woman.

I’m not pissing on her for wanting to fulfill her fat fantasy, but she does get the business for not taking the time to research what happened to the current world record holder …died due to kidney failure.

8. Appleton Police Officer


This one was a no brainer. An Appleton police officer forced two kids to shut down there lemonade stand because it was allegedly in violation of a city law.

I’m pissing on this cop for not telling them what the hell to do with lemons if they can’t make lemonade.

7. Family Guy


The executive producer of “Family Guy”, Mark Hentemann, has the ability to create some funny sketches for the show, but in real life his timing was way too soon. Just moments after the death of singer Amy Winehouse Hentemann took the stage at Comic-Con and asked the audience if anyone knew if Winehouse was still alive.

Mark gets pissed on for not leaving the Whinehouse jokes to the office dorks that forward each other pics of exposed breasts and kittens.

6. Asante Samuel


So what did Philadelphia Eagle Asante Samuel do during the NFL Lockout...work out with teammates? Visit kids in the community where he grew up? No! He was working on his rap career.



Asante gets pissed on for spending his free time rapping when he should have been figuring out a way to wrap up receivers on the football field.

5. Christine Radogno


I think that Wu-Tang is one of the most relevant rap groups in hip-hop history. But I’ll be damned if they are relevant at a meeting for the State of Illinois.



Christine Radgano gets pissed on for taking the theory that “Cash Rules” too far.

4. Jefferson County Library


Have you ever been running errands and had the sudden urge to watch a porno? Well neither have I, but if that urge were ever to arise just head on down to the Jefferson County Library. This library gives the okay for its patrons to check out the newest adult flicks in public.


The Jefferson County Library gets pissed on for taking business away from the back room at your local video store.

3. Doing Too Much


Just like this hat...sometimes people have too much going on. Have you ever met someone that says that they are working for the Department of Sanitation, while working on writing a play and training for the Summer Olympics? Translation: I’m not doing sh*t.

I’m pissing on anyone that tells me they are doing too much with themselves, because all it means is that they are sitting at home all day doing nothing and wishing that they could accomplish everything that they named.

2. Kurupt


The West-coast old school rapper has a new album on the way that will feature twenty tracks and fifty-five guest appearances.

He gets pissed on by thinking that if he added a bunch of rappers, he could mask the fact that he’s not that good of a rapper.

1. Terry Crews


This one is simple. Anyone that walks around looking like the Pink Panther on steroids gets pissed on.